Two Down ? To Go!

Hooray, Hooray! I just finished up the first draft of Chapter Two and I thought I would take a bit of a break before I run through it again for any boo boos :)

I am excited to say that Fall Of Light - Chapter One will be up for review in the circle tomorrow so we will see if I come out of it alive, LOL.

I realized after I submitted that the scene break got all messed up in the middle but I am sure that will be the least of my worries.

:)

Fall of Light - First chapters outline

**There is one thing I left out in the outline of the prologue, partly because I was tired and partly because I am still unsure about it. From where I left of the party of men and Dean travel the road, stopping for rest and food at an inn in a small village. While they eat in the commons a man joins them at the table. This man introduces himself to Prince Ladislas and Dean as Griff. He claims to be a traveler and asks of news but seems to take an interest in Dean from the start. He is a little strange for a traveler, seeming more like a scholar. During the evening Griff gifts Dean with a small coin pendant for him to wear, saying that he found it on the road telling him to keep it. After an odd farewell they leave and continue on the way to Carrador. 


The meeting with Griff will tie in with a lot of the storyline down the track but for some reason it doesn't feel right to me yet so I will keep an open mind until I find a way to write it that works or feel better about it. 


Chapter One


It is now seven years since the end of the Borderwars. Dean is hard at work in the Golden Crown, the Inn where he has lived since he was brought to Carrador after his families death.
Ladislas was the one who brought him to the Inn and got the Inn keeper, Vern and his wife to take him in. They have done well by him even if they are not the warmest people in the world and he is comfortable.
It is a busy night and Dean is busy. He notices a man he knows as Wal sitting in the corner, Wal is an adviser for Prince Ladislas who checked in on Dean a few times for Ladislas when he was younger. It isn't unusual to see Wal in the Golden Crown for a drink on occasion but something about the way he is speaking to his companion makes Dean take notice. Dean gets busy with the customers but notices when Wal gets up and leaves. 


A short while later Dean is called outside to help stable a horse and as he is returning he hears voices talking on the other side of the stable wall. The tone of their urgently whispered conversation makes Dean freeze and listen. 
One of the men seems agitated and slightly scared as he tells the other that they should re-think their plan. The other man is angry and tells him that there is no way that can happen and that the men are in place. When the first voice begins to protest there is a thud and he is silenced as his body is slammed up against the outside of the stable wall where Dean was hidden. The angry man holds him against the wall and says that nothing will threaten their plans, not even the Princes' witch man. He says that there are far more dangerous things to fear than the crown and he has no desire to be dead or worse! The orders were Summerfest so Summerfest it is, agreed?! After a moment the man is released and they move away. 


Once Dean is sure they are gone he thinks over what he heard and knows it isn't good. Obviously there where people in Carrador who where planning to do something terrible on Summerfest but what was he to do about it? Who could he tell and what would he tell them? The city watch would laugh him out of the station if he was to tell them what he had heard, without even so much as a description of the alleged conspirators.
A few hours later he lay in bed, unable to ease the feeling of dread he remembered the men talking about the Princes' man and thought of Wal. He was at the Inn, maybe he knew something about this? Resolving to seek out Wal With this information in the morning he falls asleep.


Stealing away in the morning he makes his way up to the castle. He is stopped at the gates and tries to explain to the guards that he needs to speak to the princes adviser Wal and it is important. They dismiss his urgency and turn him away from the gates. 
Dean protests saying that he is known to Wal and has some information that may be critical to him. As one of the guards raises his hand demanding Dean leave the Captain emerges from beyond the gatehouse, demanding to know what is the disturbance. Dean looks at the man recognizing him as one of the men who had ridden with Ladislas when he had been brought to Carrador.
After the guard explains the situation the Captain looks at Dean asking if this was accurate, Dean nods. With a cock of his head the captain asks who Dean is as he looks familiar. After he remember where he has seen Dean the Captain admits him, introducing himself as Reeves, Capitan of the Princes Army. 


Dean is taken to Wal and recounts what he overheard, suddenly nervous as the seemingly useless information came out of his mouth. Wal is grave but friendly asking Dean to come with him as there is someone else who might be interested in what he has to say. 
Dean follows and is surprised when he is taken to Ladislas himself. Ladislas seems genuinely pleased to see him again, he thanks Dean for the news and says that he needs attentive people like Dean out in the City, telling him to keep his ears open and return to the castle if he sees anything that he feels they might need to know. 
Dean is excused and leaves, taking notice of the of grave expressions of the three men as the door was closed behind him.


====================
This is my original beginning for Fall of Light but I am questioning it. Is it right that Dean ended up at the Inn? Or should Ladislas have taken him to work in the castle... Not that I am a fan of the whole Castle boy rises to the occasion but is Inn boy really all that much different? I have no intention for Dean to be adopted by the crown or anything but I think that it is important that he and Ladislas become friends. Perhaps once the friendship grows no one will care how he came to be there? 

Fall of Light - Intro/Outline

This is my world so far, I have yet to name it.

In true epic fantasy style my world is set in a medieval style time period, but not too traditionally.

Fall of Light is set nine years after the Borderwars. So, I will give you a quick history.

====

In the north is Eillienia, Angalia and Osakeio.

Eillienia is the main kingdom of Fall of light. It is based on the more traditional English/European medieval period.

West of Eillienia is Angalia. Influenced by Scandinavian and Norse history the Angalians are something like migrated Vikings.

East of Eillienia, over the Avalon Sea is the Island nation of Osakeio, an empire inspired by a combination of Japanese and Samurai history.

In the south is Rajangaria, and the sub country of Issan. Rajangaria is hot, dry and relatively hostile. The people are mostly nomadic clans, ruled by an individual chieftain. The countries, people and cultures of Rajangaria and Issan are influenced generally by various Middle Eastern countries and cultures.

So... For year before the Borderwars there had been fighting between Eillienia and Rajangaria but with no unification between the clans the threat of the Rajan warriors was never considered a threat to the Eillienian soldiers who patrolled the Rhone Mountains.

Then came Dharakon Khan.

Naming himself Warlord, Dharakon united the Rajan clans under his rule, leading the masses of warriors over the Bhadakhar Ranges to descend on the people of Eillienia without warning.

For almost nine years the Borderwars brought death and destruction to the northern kingdoms. It was only after the sudden disappearance of Rajan Warlord that the fighting finally came to an end.

Fighting side by side in the war had bonded the three northern kingdoms and together kings of the north vowed never to make the same mistake again, creating the Northern Alliance.

===

So the first chapter is a prologue, this post is the first half or so of the prologue in a rough outline.

Set in late winter in the time of the Borderwars is is told from the point of view of Dean, a seven year old boy who is the son of a farm owner in the village of Bolt in Eillienia.

The light is fading as Dean hurries home. Dean is worried, His father is going to be so mad with him for being late. To dean a beating seems the worst thing that could happen to him in his child s mind.

Breaking into a run he reaches the crest of the hill that leads down to the Farmstead. Dean slips on the icy ground, tumbling down the hillside and into the bramble bushes before landing face down in the ditch.

It is then that dean looks up and sees the orange glow. From the spot where he lay in the ditch he can see The yard in front of his home, illuminated by the flames of his burning home. Before him are six dark figures on horseback, their silhouettes forming a circle around the huddled forms of his Father, Mother and sister as they kneel on the cold ground.

In on fluid motion on of the riders slides from his saddle and approaches Deans family. Dean can not hear the words that are spoken. Whatever the black man said seemed to have angered deans father, he lunges protectively to move himself in front of his family.

In one frightening second the shadow man steps forward, gripping a handful of Deans fathers hand in his fist he yanks his head back. Without hesitation a knife appears in his hand, and he sweeps it over his throat. His father Falls to the ground, the screams of his mother and sister drowned out by the explosion of the fires as the beams in the burning roof give way. Dean clamped his eyes shut.

After a moment he opened his eyes again when he hears a scream, with wide eyes he looks on as the riders throw his mother and sister, roughly over the front of their saddles. With a single whistle they all remount and disappear into the darkness beyond the flames at a gallop.

Dean stays in his place in the ditch all night. Gradually the flames of the buildings die down, and by the time the first grey light of dawn arrives they are little left but smoldering embers.

Crawling out of the bramble dean slowly walks over to the still shape of his fathers body on the ground. Blinking the tears back he walks over to the remains of the barn. Poking at the smoking ashes with a stick he finds the head of his fathers shovel still intact, the handle having burnt away. He pulls it out to cool for a moment, then walks over to the trampled remains of his mothers vegetable gardens and begins to dig.

After some time of Dean hacking at the half frozen earth with the spade tip he is startled by the sounds of horses approaching. The horses are close, there is no point in running so Dean returns to his task, lift, strike, sweep, lift, strike, sweep.

The horsemen arrive by the second strike. Dean does not look up but he can not help but listen.

The man at the head of the riders curses loadly, leaping from his saddle, he stides over to Deans fathers body.

After a few breathes Dean wipes his eyes and resumes his digging. In the background he can dimly hear the men talking, then the voices go quite. Deans eyes begin to water again as he hears the footsteps approach him, stopping a few feet from where he worked. Dean blinked and continued with the motions, refusing to look up at the stranger who watched him.

The sound of steel on stone behind him made dean jump and he whipped his head around. Of all the things Dean had expected to see the reality was none of them. Dean stared bewildered for a moment, at the opposite end on the grave the man had knelt, his once fine clothes now caked in mud. Deans confusion however was that the man had began to dig using the blade of the finest looking sword dean had ever seen.

After the grave is completed the stranger helps Dean to place is body in the ground and fill it in in silence........